Written in the vein of modern TV shows and movies that portray children as adults, The Secrets of Boys continues this dubious tradition. The kids are sixteen and running around with adults who somehow don't seem to mind that their companions are underage. I suppose as long as kids dress in the right labels, have their own rides and can drink without getting the grown ups busted for giving alcohol to minors it's all okay. After all girls + high heels + professional (read: uninvolved) parents= maturity and the ability to make adult decisions.
Ahhh, young love. Cassidy Jones is shy and artistic and wears kitten heels and shops at Bebe, Kenneth Cole and Theory. (She also wears DKNY, Marc Jacobs, Calvin Klein and Cynthia Rowley and eats at Nobu. I know this because Abbott feels the need to name drop at every opportunity. There is nary a mention of any wearable item, without a designer. One gets the feeling she might be paid by the mention.) Cassidy also has a devoted, needless to say, hunky boyfriend of two years. Will she lose her virginity to him? Oh no. Not Cassidy.
Cassidy gives it up to Zach, her 19 year old TA that she's known for two minutes (she's in a summer college french class). Of course, he is wonderful and understands her and helps her to come out of her shell as no one else can. When he stops talking to her the day after he gets her to tell him she wants to have sex with her, does that end things? No(!) don't be silly!! She talks to him and convinces him that a summer romance is the perfect thing, since of course he was just trying to avoid hurting her since he would be moving back to New York after the summer.
Aaahhh. To be so young and misunderstood. But don't fret mon chere, Ms. Abbott is here to explain to all "mature" youth everywhere that she understands that they're not just teenagers, they're young adults.
Favorite Quote:
"If they were any more anal retentive, we wouldn't need a bathroom."
Overall Opinion:
I am just so relieved that I now have the definitive book of modern advice for teens. When my daughter comes of age, apparently it's 16, but I might get ahead of the ball and start prepping her at 14, I can pull out this book and she'll have all the answers. Because she sure won't want to wait until she's married to have sex and it's almost just as Puritanical to wait for the boy who loves you. The one for her then, must surely be the adult authority in the room who is the only one who can see her for who she truly is. It will be okay, really, because as Zach tells Cassidy, "Hey, I know a worthy student when I see one."
Rating:
Please. Must I?
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